Luke Derespinis

I go back to the moment I opened his bedroom door over and over again. I will never forget anything. I had an outer body experience. I was screaming, punching holes in the walls and throwing kitchen chairs.

My name is Diana Derespinis Cosentino. My brother Luke was 4 years younger than me. His addiction started short at age 15. People don’t understand or realize he not just a statistic; he was a brother, uncle, son, nephew and cousin. 

Luke was in and out of jails and hospitals, I can’t count how many rehabs all over the states. The final rehab worked. Insurance ran out and my parents spent over 30 to 40 grands just to keep him in. When they couldn’t afford it anymore he was to come back to Charlotte. I will never forget seeing my baby brother so beautifully tan, teeth sparkling white and built because the gym was his happy place. When I saw him for the first time my legs collapsed and I cried. He said, “sis why are you crying?” I said, “because you’re so handsome,  you are huge and your teeth are so white. My God what are you doing?” Being the jokester he was he said,   ‘finally brush them now.” Well, I know why insurance ran out. I believe God wanted me and my family to see him so healthy like when he was little. 

Thirty days later I found my baby brother, 23 years old dead laying on his bed. He was already gone 12 to 14 hours so rigor mortis already set in. I go back to the moment I opened his bedroom door over and over again. I will never forget anything. I had an outer body experience. I was screaming, punching holes in the walls and throwing kitchen chairs. I couldn’t let what I saw comprehend what I just saw. In my head he finally did it. He screwed me over. You see years earlier he overdosed in my house but I saved his life by doing CPR and 3 shots of Narcan from the ambulance revived him (that’s another story).  But this time, 7/31/14 he finally did this to me, I can’t beat the crap out of you and I can’t scream at you for this. You ruined my life! Luke was doing so well.  He had his own house renting with others who I thought I trusted, with people from fast and the furious. Luke was in a good place so I thought. 

I have PTSD, a mother who doesn’t leave the house and repeats on a daily basis that she wants to die, while she still has my youngest brother and my son. It was always, “Luke, what’s he doing  and is he clean. I can’t handle it Diana, I’m turning my phone off and keep yours on.” I was like a second mother to help my mom with all this. I believe that day Luke guided me with our mother to his house. People don’t understand what siblings go through. I recently got married and in my vows was, “Luke he brought my husband in my life.”

Story by
Diana Cosentino

11 replies on “Luke Derespinis”

💜 love you girly! Addiction doesn’t just ruin the addicts life, it’s a vicious roller coaster. And unfortunately sometimes never ends.

Di, I know words cannot take all the pain and hurt away from watching your brother do this and I am truly sorry for what you and your family has endured through it all. I do know though all of this you have helped so many people and you truly are an angel here on earth. ❤️

Your story is so touching and I felt your pain as I read. Bless you for being brave enough to share and strong enough to still be there helping your mom and brother with such a tragic family experience. Sending you hugs virtually.

Diane, with all the good you do in this word, I know the day will come when you will see him again and your pain will be replaced once again with your love for him.
Sue Ziegler, Jakes mom

I am so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately addiction takes so many wonderful people. Addiction leaves so many people people hurting behind. . I feel like there should be more help with addiction. Once again I am so sorry for your loss.

I’m so sorry for your pain. I have seen my brother through heroin but he is clean (sort of)
his son, my nephew is still lost. Although I can not put myself as a sibling and feel the grief of an older sister my oldest daughter can and you sharing your story helps me understand what my surviving daughters might be going through and maybe I can help them better. I, on the other hand, can feel exactly where you mom is. I did not loose any son to addiction but lost him to anxiety and depression. As a mom we do our best to stay in the present time for our beautiful babies here on earth yet part of our heart wishes to move on to be with our sons. Its quite a hell to be half here and half there.

I know girl it sucks their are no words that WILL make you feel any better I love you and we now are so Blessed that he gives you messages to help others here on earth. Thank you for everything that you do and for sharing your gift with all of us!!!!!!

I am so sorry. I also can say I relate so much to this ( my son survived ) but forever that picture is there and how I kept him alive with chest compressions. 4 bags of narcon drip n a stay in icu. Haunts me daily. I will keep you in prayer and everyone in addiction (including family of addicts).

This made my heart ache for you! I couldn’t imagine losing my sister, addiction is an awful thing to go through.

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